Comments on: "My time, unlike your schlong, grows short."
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short/
Comments on MetaFilter post "My time, unlike your schlong, grows short."Fri, 20 Dec 2013 20:09:06 -0800Fri, 20 Dec 2013 20:09:06 -0800en-ushttp://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss60"My time, unlike your schlong, grows short."
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short
<a href="http://conorlastowka.com/2013/12/a-christmas-boner/">A Christmas Boner</a> is a complete retelling of A Christmas Carol, with the added wrinkle of Scrooge's constant erection. Completely puerile, completely giggle inducing.post:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996Fri, 20 Dec 2013 19:49:39 -0800yellowbinderChristmaschristmascarolScroogebonersBy: uncleozzy
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5341943
This is the best possible thing to do with public domain works. My wife thinks I've had a stroke.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5341943Fri, 20 Dec 2013 20:09:06 -0800uncleozzyBy: sourwookie
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5341948
Between this and <a href="http://www.metafilter.com/134993/The-poo-was-very-large-and-contained-great-variety-of-cake">The Pride And Prejudice link</a>, I'm detecting a trend.
I call dibs on <em>Wuthering Farts</em>!comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5341948Fri, 20 Dec 2013 20:12:49 -0800sourwookieBy: filthy light thief
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5341960
<a href="http://projects.metafilter.com/4186/A-Christmas-Boner-A-Christmas-Carol-Remixed">Posted on MeFi Projects</a> by JoeGoblin.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5341960Fri, 20 Dec 2013 20:29:25 -0800filthy light thiefBy: entropicamericana
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5341977
lol buttscomment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5341977Fri, 20 Dec 2013 20:45:50 -0800entropicamericanaBy: The Whelk
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5341986
its a Christmas miraclecomment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5341986Fri, 20 Dec 2013 21:02:00 -0800The WhelkBy: MCMikeNamara
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5341989
The Patrick Stewart adaptation is on TNT right now, and, not for the first time, I can't stop wanting Patrick Stewart to talk about his boner.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5341989Fri, 20 Dec 2013 21:09:24 -0800MCMikeNamaraBy: charlie don't surf
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342014
The internet is really really great
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTJvdGcb7Fs">For porn</a>comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342014Fri, 20 Dec 2013 21:49:59 -0800charlie don't surfBy: InsertNiftyNameHere
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342018
Well, for this unfortunate soul, my schlong grows shorter every year. I believe it's some sort of curse.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342018Fri, 20 Dec 2013 21:57:58 -0800InsertNiftyNameHereBy: planetesimal
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342023
So that's where skinflint comes from.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342023Fri, 20 Dec 2013 22:05:57 -0800planetesimalBy: elizardbits
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342033
what is happencomment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342033Fri, 20 Dec 2013 22:26:21 -0800elizardbitsBy: InsertNiftyNameHere
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342035
<a href="http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342033">elizardbits</a>: "<i>what is happen</i>"
Well, if this is addressed to me, I think it's somehow tied into my IQ decreasing every year as well. Not much I can do about either, as far as I can tell. I refuse to buy a 1964 and a half Ford Mustang and rub steroids on my armpits. That's just me, though. No offense to the guy on the TV commercial.
(And if this was not addressed to me, please forgive me and try not to make fun of me as best you can.)comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342035Fri, 20 Dec 2013 22:34:36 -0800InsertNiftyNameHereBy: a humble nudibranch
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342038
This got a rise out of me.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342038Fri, 20 Dec 2013 22:36:33 -0800a humble nudibranchBy: five fresh fish
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342041
<em>the added wrinkle of Scrooge's constant erection</em>
I can state with some amount of experiential authority that erections normally remove the wrinkles.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342041Fri, 20 Dec 2013 22:43:23 -0800five fresh fishBy: elizardbits
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342046
i am definitely not asking for any details about your peen, o random internets strangercomment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342046Fri, 20 Dec 2013 22:57:36 -0800elizardbitsBy: jamjam
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342049
Thanks, but I think I'll wait for the puppet version, in which each part is played by an erect penis wearing a different character-condom, and Screwge finally gives the Crotchit family money for the Viagra prescription that's Tiny Tim's last hope.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342049Fri, 20 Dec 2013 23:03:51 -0800jamjamBy: louche mustachio
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342061
SO! They laugh at my BONER, will they? I'll show them!comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342061Sat, 21 Dec 2013 00:00:29 -0800louche mustachioBy: PeterMcDermott
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342110
Scrooge's boner? TL/DR.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342110Sat, 21 Dec 2013 02:38:09 -0800PeterMcDermottBy: Metroid Baby
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342199
The best part is when Scrooge has a boner.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342199Sat, 21 Dec 2013 05:51:21 -0800Metroid BabyBy: ook
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342224
O brave new world that has such boners in itcomment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342224Sat, 21 Dec 2013 06:34:30 -0800ookBy: spitbull
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342241
Lol Tiny Tim, amirite?comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342241Sat, 21 Dec 2013 07:07:11 -0800spitbullBy: drjimmy11
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342287
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-nJ4Voyrk9U">The Lord of the Books of the 55 Arse-Hymens of Stone</a>comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342287Sat, 21 Dec 2013 08:02:40 -0800drjimmy11By: egypturnash
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342329
I feel like the proper thing to do with this is to silently upvote it and move on. Sadly, this is Metafilter, where upvotes do not exist. But boners do.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342329Sat, 21 Dec 2013 08:57:05 -0800egypturnashBy: JoeGoblin
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342364
Hooray! I knew this was dumb enough for other people to like it! (I did the boner adding.) I would like to make an illustrated version happen for next Christmas. Or perhaps a Patrick Stewart narrated audio book, as he is familiar with the role.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342364Sat, 21 Dec 2013 09:47:57 -0800JoeGoblinBy: JoeGoblin
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342366
BTW, kind of funny, I submitted this book to Amazon as a kindle file, hoping to make it a free download, but before they will post it, they wanted to verify the PD status of the original. So they asked me to provide these two details:
1. The initial publication date of the works - if translated from another language, the initial publication date of the translated work - and URL(s) verifying this information
2. Each author(s) and translator's first and last name and dates of death, and URL(s) verifying this informationcomment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342366Sat, 21 Dec 2013 09:50:07 -0800JoeGoblinBy: Reversible Diamond-Encrusted Ermine Codpiece
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5342375
This cries out for a film adaptation, complete with constant "boyoiyoiyoiyoiyoing" springy sound effects.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5342375Sat, 21 Dec 2013 09:59:32 -0800Reversible Diamond-Encrusted Ermine CodpieceBy: InsertNiftyNameHere
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5343925
With all this boner talk, I quite miss my "lady pleasing" days.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5343925Mon, 23 Dec 2013 02:51:25 -0800InsertNiftyNameHereBy: telstar
http://www.metafilter.com/134996/My-time-unlike-your-schlong-grows-short#5349018
Gets better the, ah, longer you read into it.comment:www.metafilter.com,2013:site.134996-5349018Fri, 27 Dec 2013 23:29:45 -0800telstar
¡°Why?¡± asked Larry, in his practical way. "Sergeant," admonished the Lieutenant, "you mustn't use such language to your men." "Yes," accorded Shorty; "we'll git some rations from camp by this evenin'. Cap will look out for that. Meanwhile, I'll take out two or three o' the boys on a scout into the country, to see if we can't pick up something to eat." Marvor, however, didn't seem satisfied. "The masters always speak truth," he said. "Is this what you tell me?" MRS. B.: Why are they let, then? My song is short. I am near the dead. So Albert's letter remained unanswered¡ªCaro felt that Reuben was unjust. She had grown very critical of him lately, and a smarting dislike coloured her [Pg 337]judgments. After all, it was he who had driven everybody to whatever it was that had disgraced him. He was to blame for Robert's theft, for Albert's treachery, for Richard's base dependence on the Bardons, for George's death, for Benjamin's disappearance, for Tilly's marriage, for Rose's elopement¡ªit was a heavy load, but Caro put the whole of it on Reuben's shoulders, and added, moreover, the tragedy of her own warped life. He was a tyrant, who sucked his children's blood, and cursed them when they succeeded in breaking free. "Tell my lord," said Calverley, "I will attend him instantly." HoME²Ô¾®¿Õ·¬ºÅѸÀ×Á´½Ó
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